Abortion support is not, fundamentally about how you as a person feel regarding pregnancy terminations and what you did do in that circumstances; it is about supporting your friend through a potentially tumultuous period. We have less public conversations about what abortion feels like physically and emotionally or how it looks like, thus it can be difficult to find out how to anticipate it.
The good thing is that you can easily help your friends when they are making this choice for their own well-being and health. You can provide real, substantive practical help, beside emotional support.
1. Keep your own opinion out of it:
Abortion is a contentious problem, however now is really not the time to have a debate about it. If your friend has made her decision, avoid talking or do not shame her out of it; respect her body and her choices, even though they don’t correspond to your own.
2. Try not to have expectations about how she’ll feel:
More largely, your expectations regarding pregnancy termination will not be useful either. You might see her crying, or trying to connect and schedule an appointment with a doctor without even thinking, nevertheless, she will not follow your idea of how ideally getting an abortion should be like.
This is the time where you need to listen to her anxiety and her grief; you need to be a sounding board for her concerns.
4. Provide Transport and Practical help:
Pregnancy terminations are both practical and emotional undertakings. You can offer her the bus ride, plan daily routines for her, and assist her schedule time off for the appointment, or put her in the cab afterwards. You can also help her find money for the process and buy abortion pills online for her.
Part of this practical help is not only finding real and useful information concerning the procedure, but also what will take place afterwards. There are many scare stories about abortion and pregnancy out there, and it’s necessary for anybody making the choice to know the realities of abortive processes.
5. Give Emotional Support without forcing her:
In all ways allow to express whatever she wishes to say about it and what she is undergoing, whether you hear about it beforehand or afterwards. Additionally do not feel “isolated” if she didn’t tell you about it before the time; a few people play their best role in these circumstances as isolated actors, and later react on it.
If someone is undergoing incredibly difficult things, do not make them talk about it. If she needs to isolate herself afterwards, permit her to take that space. Give her space and permission to be angry, sad, upset, and self-critical; do not tell her to move on or try to get over it, or force her to behave “normally” to serve your own requirements. It is a heavy stuff, and will likely have emotional ramification, although everyone will express them in different ways.